Hello everyone,
Now I know I've already posted today, please do check that out here if you haven't already, but I've just been having such a good day..I'm finally starting to feel like myself again after feeling a bit 'odd' for a while now.
Through Febuary one of the things that I want to start doing is to do things that scare me. I'm usually the biggest wimp when it comes to speaking my mind and there's been something that I needed and wanted to say to my ex for a very long time, yesterday I finally got the courage to write out all my feelings to send to him. I wrote my message out in the notes of my phone and edited the mini essay a fair few times, just to really pinpoint what I wanted to say in one swift message and I think I felt more comfortable doing it like that as I could prepare myself all day for his reply. Now I had the plan to send it at 9pm, thanks to Facebook having that creepy location thing I could see whether he was still at work, I didn't want to bother him or for him to show any of his work pals..8:54pm and my phone buzzed. It was him. I immediately felt sick and was confused to why he had messaged me, it's like he knew I was going to lay my heart out there. Anyway, long story short he said we needed to talk and it wasn't as much of a conversation like he said as he never replied to me. But I explained that I understood there was no hope in us getting back together, as he doesn't want to, and in his message he said 'I really think you need to move on', he was right! I never really gave myself a period of time to properly get over him as I was more focused on my grandads passing, which happened a few weeks later, which was more important to me but not allowing myself enough grieving time for a broken relationship just made me make some pretty poor choices last year. What he didn't know is that I had moved on physically, I'd been with other people and I'm now happily seeing someone so things are looking good in that respect but I hadn't moved on mentally. Until today. After our little chat I instantly felt better, although I do feel slightly guilty for telling him about my current guy because that seemed to have either shocked him or pissed him off but I needed to let him know that I weren't sitting around waiting for him. I woke up this morning with such a clear mind and felt as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I've finally moved on and can let him go..I honestly feel amazing about that!
Work has also been amazing today. One person who will probably be reading this will no doubt be shocked I'm saying all this, usually I'm a bit moody in work and just moan the entire time..even though she knows some good parts of the day because I've been texting her my little adventure, but I'll get to that. I started work at 6am today meaning I had to be out of bed by 5am..I forced myself out of bed almost 20 minutes late but I done a full face of make up in record timing and was even early to work so I already felt like I was winning. I had an hour to myself in the department where I just spoke and sang to myself whilst defrosting cakes but after I had finished putting out bits and bobs and setting up for customers to come in I just felt really content. In my hours break I had a productive writing session for tomorrows post, stick around for that one, then when I got back I managed to do minimal work as we weren't busy at all. I even had a good conversation with woman who has recently been nicknamed as Voldemort! Our dishwasher chemicals were running low and there was none in the store, we rung around to local shops to see if they had any we could have and one store did which is about a 20-30 minute drive away, I was bored doing nothing and didn't feel like scraping plates so I voulenteered to go and collect the chemicals which I was allowed so about half an hour after ringing around to get permission to go I was out of that store. I got to the other one and was greeted by the most beautiful man, he was so polite and made small talk with me then he offered to carry the heavy chemicals to my car..thank you to the gorgeous face and funny personality, he brightened my day a lot! By the time I had drove back to my store, set up the dishwasher to run properly again and had my break I only had 15 minutes left to actually do work..result!
Being on a roll I thought I would arrange a few things for my next days off. Thursday I have the guy that's hopefully sticking around for a bit coming to my house for a movie afternoon, usually I go to his which is fine by me but I think he secretly wants to bump into my family to see my awkwardness! Monday I have a fun shopping spree planned where I'm just going to smell all the deliciousness from Lush and run around the Disney store..I can never contain my excitement in there!
I then ended my day by having an amazing gym session and now I've got tomorrows post to take photos for and edit. Hope you enjoyed this little bonus post, I'm just so happy with how this day is going that I had to share it as I geniunely feel happy now..hopefully no more fake smiles for a while!
Work has also been amazing today. One person who will probably be reading this will no doubt be shocked I'm saying all this, usually I'm a bit moody in work and just moan the entire time..even though she knows some good parts of the day because I've been texting her my little adventure, but I'll get to that. I started work at 6am today meaning I had to be out of bed by 5am..I forced myself out of bed almost 20 minutes late but I done a full face of make up in record timing and was even early to work so I already felt like I was winning. I had an hour to myself in the department where I just spoke and sang to myself whilst defrosting cakes but after I had finished putting out bits and bobs and setting up for customers to come in I just felt really content. In my hours break I had a productive writing session for tomorrows post, stick around for that one, then when I got back I managed to do minimal work as we weren't busy at all. I even had a good conversation with woman who has recently been nicknamed as Voldemort! Our dishwasher chemicals were running low and there was none in the store, we rung around to local shops to see if they had any we could have and one store did which is about a 20-30 minute drive away, I was bored doing nothing and didn't feel like scraping plates so I voulenteered to go and collect the chemicals which I was allowed so about half an hour after ringing around to get permission to go I was out of that store. I got to the other one and was greeted by the most beautiful man, he was so polite and made small talk with me then he offered to carry the heavy chemicals to my car..thank you to the gorgeous face and funny personality, he brightened my day a lot! By the time I had drove back to my store, set up the dishwasher to run properly again and had my break I only had 15 minutes left to actually do work..result!
Being on a roll I thought I would arrange a few things for my next days off. Thursday I have the guy that's hopefully sticking around for a bit coming to my house for a movie afternoon, usually I go to his which is fine by me but I think he secretly wants to bump into my family to see my awkwardness! Monday I have a fun shopping spree planned where I'm just going to smell all the deliciousness from Lush and run around the Disney store..I can never contain my excitement in there!
I then ended my day by having an amazing gym session and now I've got tomorrows post to take photos for and edit. Hope you enjoyed this little bonus post, I'm just so happy with how this day is going that I had to share it as I geniunely feel happy now..hopefully no more fake smiles for a while!
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